Everything goes black when you boot Joe Danger for the first time. That was how the game launched, on our retail PS3 and across the US. The screen went black, and stayed black.It was apt. Apt that it was midnight when we saw it for the first time. Apt that the four of us were in the office, once more surrounded by breakfast bowls and takeaway cartons. And it was particularly apt that the game looked properly fucked.
“It’s never done this before.”
“The lights still flashing.”
“Might be a retail PS3 thing.”
“Yeah, maybe all games just do nothing.”
I’d thought about this day, every day, for two years. Whenever I did, I pictured champagne and celebrations. Instead we had cider and sheer terror.
First there was eight hours of refreshing the PSN Store page. That was followed by an hour of checking the banners on the store, the text, the pricing, the ratings, the legals, and waiting as the game downloaded.
When we saw it black screening, though, there was no sense of surprise or panic. We looked at each other, and I was reminded of how normal this all was. During development huge highs and devastating lows are commonplace. You never expect anything to work first time, and if it does you start to get really suspicious.
We've found that especially true in indie development. You learn that if you ever jump out of your seat in excitement, someone will just pull it away from underneath you. In fact Grant did exactly that to Dave when we got our IGF nomination. It was one of the high points.
Those highs and lows were coming back to me as we sat staring at that black screen, in our little office. I remembered moving every desk in, as well as that day we got an eviction notice. By my feet was the dev kit we fought so hard to get, and the PC that exploded and lost Dave weeks of work.
We were watching the same TV that we saw the first Joe Danger wireframe rendered on, and the TV that showed up an RSX glitch. Ryan was sitting in the same spot as he was when he cracked that particular bug, and I could still picture his face when Grant found it, when we nearly slipped the release.
We’ve eaten hundreds of meals in that little room and drank thousands of cups of tea. Every wall is covered in printed previews, reviews, forum threads, all marked with highlighter. Over my desk is the final task list with the last five bugs we squashed and the three we had to ship with.
Then, suddenly, the game booted and the screen burst into life, blaring our seventies Hammond-heavy theme*. Our game was running. A game we had made ourselves and just bought from the Store. It had taken us an hour to download and those with faster connections are already playing, already on the scoreboards. Thousands of them.
We signed off the rest of the week just trying to stay on top of the scoreboards.
Even then, there was no feeling of elation. No high-fives or chest bumps. Just a feeling of overwhelming relief, quiet contentment and raw achievement.
That was my revelation when the game released. As we spent the rest of that launch night laughing about every high and low, we were already planning our next adventure. I had always thought the whole of development was building towards launch day, but I realise now it’s actually never been about that. That was just another small step, and we’ve fallen in love with the journey.
We can’t wait to do it all again, but this time with even higher highs. And some lower lows.
* There is a ten-second black screen when you boot Joe Danger on a retail PS3. This period may seem longer if two years of your life and your entire future hangs in the balance.
Hello Games is a small, new independent game developer based in southern England. Its first game, Joe Danger, is available on PSN right now. You can read other entries in the series here.